Monday, May 2, 2011
Kate Plus Hate and 8
Here's startling new evidence I am existing rather than living.
Tonight Kate Plus 8 showed up on TV and I didn't even have the energy to switch the channel. It doesn't help when you have lost the remote control and have to switch buttons on the stone aged TV. I normally hit the wrong button anyhow and retreat defeated with a crap show blaring out even louder. At least it's almost the weekend.
So Kate Plus 8. What the hell's that about anyhow?
Mildly annoying unremarkable peroxide blonde person takes her kids to the zoo in Australia. I'm waiting for something to happen, the loss of the odd limb or something in the jaws of a croc and nothing.
So the only remarkable thing about TV's equivalent of a steaming heap of wallaby poo is unremarkable peroxide woman, who may or may not have had a boob job, has more kids than some of us. Although there are certain nights after wine when I swear I have gained six more kids.
I actually work with a guy who has 13 kids. He's unremarkable but I find myself thinking he'd make better TV than Kate.
A reality show about a guy clipping his toe nails would probably make better reality TV than this. At least it's gritty. And to think I once wondered who or what is Justin Bieber? Compared to Kate the guy has talent. Sort of.
Eventually I managed to shift from the bed, alarmed in the knowledge that my YMCA membership kicks in this week. If it was Kate Winslet, Beckinsale, Middleton even or Cate Blachett, I might have avoided this embarassing fumbling back to the dark ages of manual TV. But there was no way I was putting up with another 10 seconds of Kate Goblin.
Reluctantly I was back on the news channels. I fear I'm already bored with the post mortem on Osama Bin Laden. Don't get me wrong. I don't wish many people dead but I make an exception with this evil stain on the face of humanity. But why do the networks have to go on about it, trying to find new angles on something with few new angles? At least until Donald Trump demands his death certificate.
And while we're on the subject of new angles I'm thinking Kate might want to think about reviving an old one and getting together with good for nothing ex Jon.
Because who wants to see Kate being nice to everyone as she trails round a zoo? The only thing that kept the show going before was her relentless bitch slapping of Jon.
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On Blog PTSD
Now then. What the heck. It seems I had forgotten about my blog completely rather than just neglecting it this time. To return after so long...
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Now then. What the heck. It seems I had forgotten about my blog completely rather than just neglecting it this time. To return after so long...
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Sometimes in my dreams I have an odd vision of a rotund man being chased around by scantily clad girls at double speed. Policemen and vicars...
I can't stand her.
ReplyDeleteWhy does she get to go to the zoo in Australia? I want to go to the zoo in Australia! I'll even hire midgets and humiliate them publicly by pretending they're children to go to the zoo in Australia! I love the zoo that much. This is totally not fair. pout
ReplyDeleteNice one David. Enjoyed that.
ReplyDeleteGrandpa
Life on The Farm
As a general rule I don't watch anything in which the title rhymes. It's usually a sign that the cleverest thing about the show will be the name.
ReplyDelete100+ channels and nothing to watch. I'm thinking of buying one of those DVDs that turns your TV into a fireplace.
ReplyDeleteI've never understood this show. Started off as a normal person and has morphed into her own caricature.
ReplyDeleteCan't wait for the show regarding the kids' therapy sessions...
Pearl
I can't believe this show is still on. It makes me embarrased to be an American. I'm so sick of all the reality shows, the rudeness and humiliation. We need to get some niceness back here.
ReplyDeleteI have never seen that show and I have no desire to. I'm not surprised you were bored to death over the show. :S
ReplyDeleteI hate how celebrities these days are reality stars who do absolutely nothing. It's so unglamorous and ridiculous.
Now if cameras decided to follow a hilarious and interesting dad like you, that would be a different story. I just know all sorts of weird crap out happen and it would be hysterical! :)
You know you have died and gone to prime time hell when the telly is stuck on that old hag Kate. How she ever got a television show in the first place is shocking. Seriously. Just because someone rented out their uterus to a litter of critters doesn't mean they are deserving of a tv deal or that they should be allowed anywhere in civilized society. I'm just saying...
ReplyDeleteI can't believe she's still on tv. She's getting a little chunky around the thighs too.
ReplyDelete"At least until Donald Trump demands his death certificate." <-Great line, David!
xoRobyn
I knew there was a reason I stopped watching television.... thanks for reminding me that I'm not missing anything, LOL :-)
ReplyDeleteSorry you're having to suffer through the sludge, though...
didn't think you'd be a fan OT; poowtt Anna - we all want to go to a zoo in Australia. Glad you liked it Grandpa. Yup, in this case it is, Christopher. Well said Scots Lass. Hmm, might work Li. That would be great Pearl, snigger. I know, eh Suzanne, they have shows like that in the UK too, tho. you are too kind, Jennifer. However, I fear my life is boring. I'm not feeling the love of Kate, Empress. Glad ya liked the line, Robyn. That's a good reason not to watch TV e.a.s.
ReplyDeleteI wonder how she would support 8 kids as a single mother if it wasn't for this show. Hopefully, her kids will benefit in the end.
ReplyDeleteKate Goblin! Don't feel bad, David, I don't even know how to work a remote. And I agree with you on the bin Laden coverage. I turned it off a long time ago, and look for quick updates only via internet... I was a bit dazed with it all.
ReplyDeleteIf you are all bored with this type of TV - try "The Fall and Rise of Reggie Perrin" (on DVD) - brilliant British humour circa 1985. Brilliant satire, wit and delivery of lines as fast as "I am the Very Model of a Modern Major General" and if you don't pick up that reference you are probably too young to enjoy the above-mentioned show. I believe your libraries can get it.
ReplyDelete