Baboons
earn the sacred B spot in the A-Z challenge because they are so loathsome.
My
childhood is haunted by trips to soulless concrete zoos in Britain when I’d
peer into the baboon enclosure to be exposed to scenes of screaming, fighting,
gang rape and the like committed by oversized monkeys with raw red bottoms; all
of which probably explains why I was scarred for life.
A male baboon acting like the mane man (Dick Mudde)
If there’s
one species that makes me want to be a creationist and believe mankind was
created in a flash of lightning rather than evolved from primates, it’s the
aggressive old baboon.
To me the
most offensive aspect of the baboon is its sticky out red bottom. Most self
respecting beasts would want to keep a backside like that hidden away. Not the
baboon, it seems. It makes me feel no better to know their inflamed looking
butts have a use. Apparently a female baboon initiates mating by presenting her
swollen rump to the male's face. Lovely.
Wikipedia –
which I will draw on heavily during this challenge because I am feeling lazy –
describes the aggression displayed by baboons which includes a “quick flashing
of the eyelids accompanied by a yawn to show off the teeth.”
Apparently some
males succeed in taking a female from another's harem, in an act called a
"takeover".
“In many
species, infant baboons are taken by the males as hostages during fights,” adds
Wikipedia.
It seems
not only are baboons ugly sex offenders but they’ll also resort to child
kidnap. There are five species of baboon and they live in Africa and Arabia.
They are the Olive
Baboon, the Guinea Baboon, the Chacma Baboon, the Yellow Baboon and the
Hamadryas Baboon.
Ancient Egyptians considered the Hamadryas
baboons to be sacred and related them with Thoth, the god of letters. Frankly I
find the idea of baboons being scared laughable, perhaps explaining why the
Egyptians all ended up mummified.
Useless Fact About Baboons
Baboons
take part in social groomingn by picking parasites, dead skin, nefarious gunk, dirt and other unpleasant objects from each other's fur. The act strengthens social bonds within the group but the picking order is also a pecking order with the boboon who is being groomed having a higher status in the group than the one doing the grooming. Having a pal to pick out your lice is the kind of baboon equivalent of having a butler.
What
Not to Say to a Baboon
Maybe
I can get you a pair of pants
Baboons have always made me giggle. Yeah I'm that grown adult that laughs at their naked bums!
ReplyDeleteI know Dani - join the grown adult that laughs at naked bums club.
DeleteThey are rather hideous aren't they. I mean not just their bulbous red bottoms but their faces.
ReplyDeletewell really Juliette and honesly their faces do look like their bums.
DeleteBaboons have to be one of the ugliest creatures ever!
ReplyDeleteTaMara
Tales of a Pee Dee Mama
good to know you are not a fan TaMara - in fact, who is?
DeleteWell now. After reading about their mating practices, I'm so happy I'm not a baboon. Okay, yes, there are other reasons I'm happy too, like my butt isn't red. Or hanging out all day.
ReplyDeleteto be fair there are lots of reasons Jean lol
DeleteOMG look at that thing, I agree with jojo- monkey butts are not pretty to look at.
ReplyDeleteno really always hated seeing baboons Jessica
DeleteShiver...baboons have always grossed me out...for many reasons, which you've outlined nicely. Off to remove the images from my brain. :)
ReplyDeletemay not be sooo easy Tracy :)
DeleteSo coincidental, I went to the zoo yesterday...luckily, We don't have baboons in this one. I remember a time I got bit by a baboon...in the drive-through Safari we went to in England, they picked apart our soft-topped car. I do not like baboons! :P
ReplyDeleteJamie Dement (LadyJai)
http://writebackwards.we3dements.com
euw having a baboon bum on my car bonnet would be the worse Jamie..
DeleteBaboons are definitely a nasty bunch. I can't help but laugh at the red bottoms and now knowing the baboons use their swollen rumps to flirt makes them even funnier.
ReplyDeleteThey are positively without taste Julie :)
DeleteI don't have anything against baboons. I don't have to live with them after all. And to each his own, I guess. Looks like an interesting theme for the A to Z.
ReplyDeleteThanks Inger but sounds like you are in the minority lol
DeleteYeah, I've never really liked baboons either.
ReplyDeleteA to Z Participant
Cherie Reich - Author and Surrounded by Books Reviews
I know right Cherie, thanks for coming back to the blog :)
DeleteBaboons have always scared me-- with their attitude and their teeth!
ReplyDeleteDamyanti @Daily(w)rite
Co-host, A to Z Challenge 2013
Twitter: @AprilA2Z
#atozchallenge
they don't have much going for them am thinkng Damyanti..
DeleteOh, you caught me off guard - I dislike baboons - It's a shame i would be so resistant to appreciating their appearance . . . I could have dreamed up all kinds of expectations about your "B" choice - what a delight to have my brain expanded so early in the day.
ReplyDeleteHappy AtoZ Month! -g-
always happy to expand one's brain in the direction of baboons Maggid :)
DeleteI don't like baboons too. Their ugly red rumps bother me especially. Funny post you got here! You still have the most informative B animal post I've read, btw.
ReplyDeleteThanks Dee - I do hope to inform a wee bit
DeleteI enjoy zoos (not the baboons so much) but my husband gets attacked by animals (banny hens, otters, small monkeys) at every time he goes to the zoo!
ReplyDeleteLove the usless facts!
glad you like the useless facts :)
Delete