Why I hate Froggie - part 6

Over the weeks I've come to hate Froggie, although I never knew where he came from or when he arrived.

Now suddenly I'm on the computer and he's busting into my consciousness, he's breaking down the door of my private party and he hasn't even brought  a bottle.

"Bash, slam, bash, bash," goes Froggie and Jackson smashes his leering face against the bars of his cot. I wince as I anticpate the wood cracking.

And then Froggie's emitting loud repetitive croaks. I swear he's like R2-D2 on acid.

The problem with Froggie is that I can't take him away and dipose of him. He's attained the status of Favorite Toy and in our household this translates as "serious shit."

I'm afraid to say Froggie with his lunatic grin is here to stay, for the short term at least, although I don't expect him to be a semi permanent fixture like TV repeats of Sponge Bob Square Pants. Kids are notoriously fickle unless something happens to be a gigantic idiot yellow sponge.

Still for now Froggie haunts my dreams and makes them nightmares. Every morning as I'm making Jackson's daycare bottles I wait nervously for the crash as Froggie is hurled aross the wooden floors, followed by the sort of giggle from Jackson that wouldn't be out of place in a Chukie film.

Last night I was trying to work on the computer when I was repeatedly disturbed by deep croaks from the bowels of Jackson's cot. I explored further and found Jackson fast asleep, Froggie buried somewhere near his hind quarters.

I swear there are keyhole surgeons who have used less precision as I prized out Froggie, briefly thought of burying him in a sarcophagos like the one round the reactor at Chernobyl and then thought better of it.


  1. As an aunty of three with no children this sounds like just the type of toy I'd buy.

  2. Nothing could be worse than Barney and singing the evil I love you song... nothing!!!!

  3. you are welcome to it. You are right. I was once unlucky enough to be at a Barney show and I did feel like throwing up.

  4. that sucks, its not even a toy you can take the batteries out of

  5. It really does - but you can throw it out the window

  6. My husband likes to tell the story of how his dad just threw his pop gun out of the window of a moving car. And my husband, then about 7, was only making the pop-pop-pop sounds himself; no toy sound effects. Apparently this problem has been around awhile.

  7. Another delightful post, David!!
    That sounds like the toy I would buy if I had kids.

    Have a great Wednesday!


  8. I bet it is better than watching/listening 'Snow White' again and again.
    That picture above is so cute !

    I notice it is part 6 .

  9. I love this post and the photo is priceless! I guess this is a warning for those buying toys for tots to buy the soft and silent ones. LOL

    Julie Magers Soulen Photography

  10. Ha ha ha! This reminds me so much of when I bought a toy karaoke machine for my godchild. Her parents brought it over to our house on their next visit, left it there and then immediately decided it was time to take us up on our offer of babysitting her. We'll never buy such a noisy toy again!

  11. indeed - some toys should be put out of their misery - thanx for the follo


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