I recall a conversation with a friend a couple of years back.
She had just joined an online dating site and had met a guy who seemed to be nice but turned out to be a paranoid freak and she had ditched him.
"Yeah. The guy sounds like a freak," I said.
I only recall this because I was absent-mindedly browsing through their wedding photos on Facebook today. I don't think my friend talked to me much since. Maybe she was not a close friend. Which raises the question does one write.
A - congratulations
B - Isn't this the guy you said was a freak?
C - Not bother to comment.
Now most of us would opt for A or C and indeed I oped for C. But alarmingly I would have taken rather a lot of pleasure in B.
So my daughter was meant to take 10 tins of food into girl scouts.
I asked her why.
"So as I can get a badge."
"Oh so we give away most of the week's food so as you can get a badge."
I receive a terse text from my wife asking me why I wasn't emptying the whole of the larder. Do I answer.
A - Because I don't give a flying about a sew-on badge
B - Because the Girl Scouts is essentially an evil organization.
Well neither because I get another text saying the tins are for the homeless and I should have known that. So I compromised on six tins, mainly items like diced tomatoes, minced tripe etc. I have no problem with it going to the homeless but I really detest the Girl Scouts and not just because all of their cookies are sucky (apart from the chocolate mint ones).
Girl Scouts meet in a dingy church hall, most of the people there are trashy and it's run by two terminally grumpy and rude women who grunt at me when I ask them a question. The one time my daughter wore her uniform nobody else did.
I am throwing these random and mismatching factoids together because they sum up my mood of petulant defiance today. We are expected to do things a certain way and if we don't do them people frown at us.
It's like going to church. In many parts of America people look at you like you have a small aerial coming out of the back of your head and are receiving messages from the Planet Zob if you don't go to church.
Well I can tell you I have attended church in America and it's mostly the same old dull dialogue I used to snooze through in Britain, although you may actually see someone under 70 years of age.
A lot of people seem to be giving up their blogs lately I've noticed. I wonder if this is because they have become passe and no longer cutting edge and exciting. Maybe blogging has gone from being a bit daring to being another bloody chore like going to church.
I've certainly thought of giving it up. Or refocusing it. Or finding some kind of niche. Like restricting my blogs to a particular species of South American centipede.
Someone said to me "keep trucking" the other day. It seemed a curious thing to say to someone who doesn't have a truck but I suppose it's decent advice. What other choice do I have?